When I became a work-at-home mom, I began to wonder whether my pursuit was even possible. I know working moms, I know stay-at-home moms, but I don’t know many work-at-home moms. Of those WAHMs I know, their work is out-of-the-home sales or crafts. The more I searched, the more perplexed I became that I wasn’t finding professional women who work out of their homes while raising their children. I know these women exist. Maybe my Googling skills have failed me. If you’re out there and have a blog, let me know - I’d love to meet you!
I didn’t know if I could pull off being a WAHM. Still don’t. I searched the blogosphere to try to find examples, models to live by. Finding none (yes, none!), I resolved to put myself out there. I’m not an expert at this WAHM thing; I’ve only just started. But if I can do and others find this blog wondering if they can do it, they can read along in my trials, failures, and successes.
First, a quick introduction: My name is Laura, I’m 32, I work in a technical field, and I have a 3-month-old daughter Josephine, my first. I’ve known for a long time that being a wife and mother was a calling of mine. I’ve known for even longer that my career was also a calling of mine. I love what I do. I love it so much that I’ve worked and continue to work for free. I went through a lot of higher education and both tough and amazing experiences to get where I am today in my career.
I didn’t put off being a mother for my career. It took me longer than some to find the man I was meant to marry. My husband is also a 32-year-old highly educated professional. We’ve been married for 14 months but we’ve known each other for almost a decade. We wasted no time in conceiving our first child and we’re jumping on the chance to conceive our second whenever I’m fertile again.
I’m a WAHM by accident. A year ago, I was in a mid-level management position for a start-up company. We found out I was pregnant last April around the same time we figured out that my company’s temporary financial troubles weren’t temporary. As the months went on, it was clear to me that I would soon be out of a job. It was only by the kindness of my direct boss that I had employer-sponsored health insurance for the birth. My office closed its doors in November and I resigned at the end of the year.
For the first couple of months of my unemployment/maternity leave, I job searched. I found little that would be a good fit for me. The few possibilities I applied to did not get back to me. Discouraged, I turned my attention to my alternate path: the consulting company I began in August that I created so I wouldn’t have an unemployment gap on my resume.
Then, the unexpected happened: I secured a paying client! Everyone I had reached out to for advice thought that I was too young and inexperienced to be a consultant, yet someone hired me on an on-going basis to help with a nonprofit start-up. I’m also working for free for a client who doesn’t have the funds to pay me now but may someday, though I’ll believe it when I see it. I found other means of bringing in income as well, such as writing reports to sell on my company’s website. I’m even writing a book about my industry that I hope to publish by the end of the year.
I do all this and care for my infant child. I’m very fortunate that I have a husband with a well paying, stable job who can provide for our family on just his income alone. Not everyone has that luxury. I’m also very fortunate that my husband has some flexibility in his schedule so he can work from home almost any time he wants, so he has been able to watch the baby when I’m out for a meeting. We haven’t yet had to pay for child care.
I worked from home a lot during my last job and loved it. I’m much more productive and efficient when I work from home! I don’t miss the office, I don’t miss coworkers, and I don’t miss the commute. I find that I can easily balance my professional work and my domestic work. Teleconferences are great times for me to fold laundry, put away dishes, stretch some yoga poses, or even decorate for Christmas. I can wash clothes, wash dishes, and write emails at the same time.
And now these days, I have a baby at my breast or napping on my chest frequently as I use the computer, including as I type this. Video calls are the only time that I need to hide this fact, and those are rare. Phone calls can be difficult as well if the baby is fussy or crying, but I’ve learned how to handle this. Josephine is my constant work companion and I love it!
I get such joy being with my baby most of the day every day, watching her grow, appreciating the little moments. At any time in my day, even when I’m on the clock, I can pause the clock for a baby break. I play with her, I read to her, I carry her around the neighborhood for short walks. One afternoon this past week, we spent some time out on the porch enjoying the storm together. Hypothetically I could run errands with her during the day, but she hates the car.
When Josephine was 4-weeks-old, I left her with my husband for two full business days so I could attend a local two-day workshop. That was difficult, but we managed it. When she was 6-weeks-old, I left her with my husband and went out of town for a day and a half. That was really, really hard, but we managed it.
Three times thus far I’ve taken Josephine with me to a professional setting. The first two times were casual networking dinners. The third time, just last week, was for a meeting at a university campus. I’ve been so hesitant each time I’ve decided to blur the lines between my professional life and my personal life by bringing her with me. But each time, my colleagues didn’t seem to mind. Some were really excited to see a baby. Some may have minded, but said nothing. Each time, I ended up being glad that I took her.
It’s hard for me to know at what point I’m paving the road for working mothers and at what point I’m damaging my reputation, or perhaps both simutaneously. I work in a male-dominated field. Will colleagues take me seriously if I bring a baby to workplaces with me or if they knew that I worked from home with a baby? Will other women feel empowered not to hide their motherhood from the professional community? I don’t know.
As with all new mothers, I’m making this up as I go. Yes, I read books and listened to the advice of both young and experienced moms everywhere, but nothing really prepared me for motherhood. It’s a new adventure that Josephine and I are embarking on together. Will I be able to successfully work from home when she gets older, more mobile, and more in need of my attention? Will I be able to successfully work from home if I’m blessed with multiple children? Will a full-time dream job call into my lap tomorrow, inspiring me to return to the world of office work?
I don’t know, but I’ll find out. Keep reading along to see how my journey at a WAHM progresses.
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| Josephine and me at the local fair this week. |
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